It’s about time that women’s underwear had a voice, and we’re honored to bring it to you. We’re classy like that. Underwear is a secret a girl has with only herself, and the guy she’s sleeping with. It’s like a secret identity she hides under her clothes, a part of her feminine mystique she keeps tucked away from the eyes of the general public.
You’re into clean lines, but also staying super comfy throughout your exhausting 9-5 workday. You’d much rather be snuggled up with a marathon of “PLL” than have to slave away over a report for your boss.
Sometimes people call you lazy, but it just isn’t the case. You’re just super chill and would rather spend your time doing you than doing mindless bullsh*t for The Man.
You want to be dancing at music festivals, not dancing around office gossip. You don’t have time or patience for other people’s sh*t.
Your dream life would consist of lying on a beach somewhere, catching rays with a gorgeous man, sipping cocktails from coconuts and washing your worries away in the ocean. You were made for the island life, not life chained to a desk.
You’re the ultimate free spirit, and you own it.
You love laughing more than any other activity, which is great because you have a great giggle that makes everyone around you smile, too. As a kid, you always tried to make everyone around you feel included, and you’re still the same kind, empathetic person today. When your friends need advice, they come to you first because they know you’ll be honest but gentle.
You’re a sporty girl with a great butt. Nothing looks quite as adorable as a pair of ass cheeks hanging out the back of a pair of flirty boy shorts. You’re the kind of girl who dresses for herself and your style is easy-going and free.
You’re the kind of woman people depend on, one who can lead a group with comfort and ease. You’re innovative and charismatic, but you’re also very social and friendly.
You’re a go-getter and a hard worker. You put comfort first so you can always be on your game. You don’t have time to waste buying expensive, frilly panties when you have so much on your plate.
You love cuddling and always identify with the wise best friend in romcoms. When a friend is in need, you’re the first one to offer support. You’re great at budgeting money but have a tendency to lose track of time, so you wind up running late a lot. Fortunately, you have a great smile and infinite amounts of positive energy, so people forgive you pretty quickly.
Given the choice, you always prefer a good whiskey cocktail over a glass of beer. You often feel like you were born in the wrong decade. When it comes to pop culture, you wish all the celebrities of today — as well as their crazy awards show performances and social media antics — could be replaced by Old Hollywood starlets and leading men. You have an all-time favorite shade of red lipstick that makes you feel amazing whenever you wear it.
You’re extremely ambitious. Once you set your eyes on a goal, whether it’s in your career or in your personal life, nothing can keep you from reaching it — even if you have to put up with a little discomfort to get there. You balance this zeal with lots of love for your family and friends, who all think of you as one of the most consistently put-together people they know.
You’re a bad bitch. There’s no argument about it. A thong is the staple of the Alpha Female, the leader of the pack. You take no sh*t from anyone.
You might be a little (read: a lot) intimidating; no one will argue you’re anything but fierce.
You’re the one your friends look to when making plans and you’re the one they go to when seeking guidance. You’re sexy as hell and definitely a man-eater.
You hold your own in every relationship and are never afraid to speak your mind.
You try to add a little extra elegance into everything you do. Sophia Loren is your ultimate style icon, but you always prefer to blaze your own trail rather than follow somebody else’s. You believe in balancing practicality with style — nobody will ever catch you in 4″ heels unless they’re deceptively comfy.
Undies With Text
You still have the same amount of energy as you did in your early 20s. People regularly call you “bubbly,” “cute,” and “adorable,” which you feign annoyance towards but secretly enjoy. You love to listen to the radio and, as a result, know at least half the words to every Top 40 hit on the charts right now. You have never passed by a dog you didn’t want to pet.
There are two things about you that make you likable and awesome: First, you like to be comfortable and you give zero f*cks about what anyone thinks about your underwear choices, and secondly, you’re definitely quirky and you’re cool with it.
Incidentally, your ginormous underwear choice also likely means you aren’t getting laid often. (Sorry.) It also indicates you aren’t one for skinny jeans or mini skirts.
You’re a woman who prefers a date with Netflix over a date with a man, and knows the only person you’ve got to answer to is yourself.
You don’t believe in being uncomfortable for the sake of style, no matter what. You’ll put on a dress every now and again, but only one that is ultra-comfortable and not too expensive. That said, you have a tendency to splurge on fancy cupcakes every now and again. (They’re so cute and perfectly decorated!)
Did you know going commando is actually really, really good for your health? Yep, your vagina will thank you and we all know if your vagina is happy, you’re happy.
You’re an easy-going girl who doesn’t have time to f*ck with something as arbitrary as underwear. Why would you want to make extra laundry when you can forgo the laundromat by skipping out on panties?
You’re a problem-solver who’d rather spend her time enjoying the sunshine than sitting inside folding her clothes.
You live life with so much passion, and you find the endless beauty in every single thing. People admire your positive energy.
Girls want to be you, and guys want to be with you. You’re genuine, and it shines through and through.